It takes 111-135 mile per hour winds to move and lift a car, and for the last week I've felt nothing but like my small blue Pontiac in a whirling rainstorm. Unable to control my thoughts, feelings, or the outcomes of this "weather we've been having." I'm not great at thinking rationally in times of stress and hurt (who really is?) However, I do believe that I've gotten a lot better at not letting the tornado of toxic thoughts go on for too long. Yesterday I decided to drag myself out of bed and do something for myself, by myself. I've never enjoyed being alone, to be more specific, I find myself to be uncomfortable without the company of another. After all that's when the toxic thoughts come for me. But for the past two days that's almost all it's been...all of the "what ifs" and myself locked in my four-walled bedroom. That is until I'd grown bored with tiring myself with the words in my head and decided to try to entertai