Saturday, September 24, 2016

New Ideas

Hello all 3 of you who read this!

Recently I haven't been blogging because I've been so so busy and also because I haven't really had an ideas on what to write about! Buuuuuuut I got cool book from Barnes & Noble called "300 writing prompts".  So I decided that I would just take a question from the book and hopefully write about it each week.  There's obviously gonna be weeks where I won't do it because I'll either A) Forget OR B) Be (no pun intended) busy. Sooooo the question this week is:

"Do you consider yourself and introvert or an extrovert? How does this compare to how others see you?"

I've always kind of struggled with this question because when I'm in a uncomfortable or new situation I'm definitely an introvert.  I get very nervous about first impressions so I tend to struggle with acting casual and cool.  But then there's times where I'll be at football games and be the ONLY one cheering and everyone is looking at me.  I mean I act like I don't care about what they're thinking or their weird looks but I do.  I just try my best to shrug it off.  I have to remember that in 10 years none of it will matter and that we all will more than likely not remember it.  Anyways back onto subject I feel like I'm 65% extrovert and 35% introvert.

ALSO I've decided to do quote of the week soooo the quote this week is from Oscar Wilde:

"Never love someone who treats you like you're ordinary"

Cheers to a good week cause the Lord above knows we will need it.

Monday, July 18, 2016

cleaning, stressing, and running

It could be 2 in the afternoon or midnight and I will literally be sitting here in my bed listening to music and overthinking and worrying once again.  Overthinking is a natural reflex for me.  I could be in the middle of class, I could be watching a movie, heck I could be hanging out with friends and all of a sudden I zone out.  I either start thinking about stuff that would never happen or I think of an embarrassing moment and what I could have done differently.  This morning I woke up at 5:30 and started stressing about a big event coming up so I got up out of my bed and went on a run.  Which helped for the time being, I eventually came back home and went to bed again.  Skip ahead about 4 hours later and I'm in drivers training stressing out again.  I just wish I didn't make things so complicated.  I love going with the flow but I just get so worried and I end up making things complicated.  I get attached to people so easily too and I hate it.  I wish I was more guarded that way I wouldn't get hurt so easily.

Well on the bright side I've decided to start running at 5:30 every morning.  OH and I deep cleaned my room these past two days to stop myself from overthinking and it really worked until it got around 5 and I was done.  I then watched friends and folded laundry to keep myself busy and then I ate pizza so that was nice.  I went back to my room and listened to music then it got around 8 and I fell asleep listening to Ron Pope with the window open so I could hear the little league 14 and under baseball practice.  I woke up about an hour and a half later, the practice was over and the worrying came back.  I ended up going in the living room and socializing with my parents.  So here I am blogging at 9:56 on a Monday night still listening to music and making sure my friends are happy...

It is now 10:02 and I should probably take a shower.  I will end up taking one after I lay in my bed for another hour.


Sunday, July 3, 2016

Happy Happy Happy :)

This is has been one roller coaster of a year.  I know in my last blog I made it sound like it has been all been bad.  But I guess I have to admit that there has been a lot of good things as well.  I think my freshman year was really just for me to figure out who I am.  Oh and trust me I am still doing that.  I have been trying a lot of new things lately.  Due to me not getting in the community show (which I guess it really wasn't the end of the world haha) I wanted to fill up my time.  Trust me its been very hard for me to push myself to keep up with these things and to force myself to stay in them.  I never really pictured myself to actually be doing flags with the marching band OR doing the Miss Goodview pageant.  But these things are teaching me to be confident.  Recently I lost my dear Grandma Dorothy and it was pretty hard and still hasn't really set in with me yet.  She was one of the easiest people to talk to.  She knew how to keep a conversation going and you knew that she was actually listening to your stories.  But she gave the best advice and encouragement.  I think that the reason I kept going on with this pageant is her.  While she was in the hospital she told me that I need to do this pageant, not to win, but for the experience.  And well grams I'm doing it! I know I can do it I just need to push myself outside of my comfort zone.  I just I don't know I feel very appreciative of my life, friends, and especially my family.  I also currently feel very hyper because I drank a huge cup of coffee this morning.  But besides the fact I'm like really just happy right now.  I am still figuring things out but it's okay because I know things will end up alright.  Staying positive is probably my main goal right now.  Okay staying positive and being confident are my 2 main goals right now.

Stay happy and positive
~Hope :)